Winter Games

Mrs. Jogger and I are dutifully watching the Winter Olympics. I have decided that the bulk of the games fall into one of two categories.

Speed events. These are nice and clean. Whoever gets to the bottom of the hill (or around the oval) first wins. The problem is, they don't all go at once. So the only way to tell who's winning is to watch the little timer in the corner. Other than that, the visuals are all the same. Honestly, if you showed me the worst luge run of the night, with a little timer showing the guy beating the leading time, I'd never know it. They all look the same to me.

Judged events. These are interesting. People do different things. This pair does a graceful routine; that one does something more up tempo. Included in this are a lot of the new sports: snowboarding and moguls and freestyle skiing. The problem is, I don't know how to judge them. So I have to wait for the judges to tell me whether the routine was any good.

A couple of events don't fit into either category. Hockey, of course, but I don't like watching hockey that much. And short track speed skating. I know, it's a speed event, but everyone who is competing in one heat is on the ice at once. You can tell who's ahead. And they have to jockey for position. I remember an event four years ago where there were four people in the final race. Three of them were duking it out, and the fourth guy was cruising well behind. One guy in the lead slipped and took out the other two, and all of a sudden the schlub is an Olympic Gold medalist. Now that's drama!